IMP
by Jason Demonfoot
Summary: what if there was a monstrous magical creature that had the cunning of a million slytherins, the ability of a shapeshifter and the morals of a psychopath though a little better in certain cases


Disclaimer do not own harry potter JK Rowling does and I do not profit from this other than in migraines and irritation at my writing ability now leave me alone

It was a leisurely day for our hero today not too hot, not too cold and most assuredly boring. Now I know what you may be thinking but no our hero is not the famous "boy-who lived" or any of them in fact they do not appear until later, no our hero as it were is in fact a being with no name but prefers to go by I.M.P. which stands for "Infernal Malignant Personification" which it enjoys the very thought of. Now our imp is not any kind of normal magical creature, thank merlin we'd never survive if it was, no our imp is a magical failure to a drastic extreme that the entirety of Britain tried and succeeded (for once) to cover up. Now that is not necessarily a good thing for you see the imp is the most devious and destructive being alive, his only values are that which brings him more of what he wants though that changes quicker than anything else.

The I.M.P. was actually the result of a project to get rid of any bad effects of magic, the thing is that they forgot about storing it in which it sealed itself inside of the machine and the imp was truly born, but he was born full grown and his first appetite was for human blood so there were almost no survivors and those that did ended up dying in the next few days or too traumatized to speak in which the cover up began long after the imp escaped.

At first the imp looked exactly like an imp but after a while its powers grew it gained the different abilities the magical world acquired and changed itself into a decent looking male with simple but casual looking clothes, eye that glow like the burning pits of hell when excited and a mop of messy black hair that ends up shadowing his eyes.

Personality wise the imp was quite neutral on the good and bad spectrum for even the most evil of magic dislikes the thought of certain things abuse being a major one of them, though he doesn't mind most of the other stuff which h only sees it as a challenge. Now as we get back to our imp he looks to have covered himself in blood and is just going about his day in a casual manner scaring the ever living bejesus out of anyone that sees him. "Hmm" thought the imp with dark glee "what should I do today. Rob gringotts, nah did that a few days ago they would still be updating their security, kidnap a high ranking politician, nah too whiny and I swear the toad woman was coming on to me" shudders" mm why not go get some ice-cream I deserve a treat, he he". Deciding what he wanted to do he immediately apparated with a glass shattering bang causing total chaos in his wake.

When he appeared he was right in front of the leaky cauldron when he entered all noise stopped. "Good lord" tom the barman said "what happen to you?" "Decided to partake in a bloodbath my dear friend" said the imp while grinning a sharped tooth grin. Everyone in the bar paled and scooted away as quickly and as quietly as possible which the imp looked around losing his grin and immediately told them" not that type of blood bath you morons! I got enough blood to fill a good tub full and bathed in it, jeeze you people always assume the worst." The imp left out the back door too which he casual said as he was going "but that doesn't explain how I got the blood does it taa!" to which he left laughing at the mass pandemonium that his words caused.

"Ahh always a job well done, now I really deserve that ice cream, I wonder if they got blood flavoured?" to which the imp chuckles evilly at " if not then maybe I should make some, hum could really profit from vampires for that, maybe later for now ice-cream! As he was walking to Florean Fortescue's ice cream parlour some rude individual (in his mind anyway) bumped into him, "hey watch it" said the individual "ha and who's going to make me you? You're nothing more than a fat sack of shit." To which the man grew red "apologize you damn lowlife or I will bring the entirety of the ministry down on your head!" "And who are you supposed to be?" I am Wulfric Ulenmire head of the department of foreign muggle affairs, now who are you supposed to be?" I am the infernal malignant personification but you can call me imp." Ha! You call yourself that obviously you are below my notice, now begone before you contaminate my air. "You know? You really should be cheating on your wife like that." "What! How do you know about that?" "Oh… I know a lot of things , a few of them can involve lots of jail time, or if I get my way and trust me I always get my way, you will more than likely be used as a test dummy for all kinds of experimental spells and if I heard right that can be worse than death." The now very pale Wulfric slow backed away but imp kept on him whispering worse and worse things that can be done till the man ran screaming while his magic tried to lash at imp, who blasted it right back at the man slowly turning him into a discoloured snail.

Continuing on his way imp finally reached Florean Fortescue's ice cream parlour he casually went up to the counter, assured Florean that he was fine and ordered one of the sugariest desserts on the menu paid and went on his way.

After finishing his ice-cream imp decided to visit one of those people that he enjoys being around Luna Lovegood. Upon getting there imp saw Luna crying over her mother which imp could tell was dead. Imp feeling sorry for the child did something he never normally did ( other than feeling sorry for anyone) he hugged Luna and told her that everything was going to turn out just fine and assuring her that her mother was in a much better place which caused her to hug him harder and ask "do you really think so?" to which imp replied" child I was made artificially meaning I had to go through an entire cycle of crap" Luna hits him lightly for swearing" in the afterlife to which I know the judgement system well enough to know she is going to a very good place. Now is there anything I can do to make things better?" "Can we get ice cream?" "You'll have to ask your father." "He is at the office in diagon alley right now." "Well then I guess I can take you there tell him what happened and have you ask him ok?" "Ok."

Now you may be wondering why are the Lovegoods people he trusts, well that is because they naturally cause chaos and upon meeting him and hearing his humour weren't immediately horrified or tried to run from him seeing that quickly endeared them to him and it is from Luna that imp gained mage sight which involved Luna pointing and imp squinting quite hard till he saw them.


End file.
